I decided to take some advice from Joleen and just told P how I wanted my birthday to go. For instance, when he started talking about how we needed to get groceries for Friday, I simply said, �If we go out for brunch and dinner, then I don�t have to cook at all and we don�t need to worry about groceries.� And he thought that was a great idea. I also told him it would be nice to have dinner at 7, get home by 8:30, do B�s baby fireworks thing (sparklers, snakes, party-poppers, and other wee-kid stuff), and then relax on the deck with hot drinks and watch the fireworks all over the valley below us. Again, he thought that was a perfect plan. And inbetween scheduled events for the day, I told him I just wanted to relax, take a nap, enjoy the perfect weather (which really was perfect � sunny and about 75 degrees) and do whatever I wanted.
And that�s how it went. As for the gift, well, he went the safe route and got me a gift card at Bed Bath and Beyond, which I will have no trouble spending. He also got me a big box of See�s candies. Yay! No more chocolate covered cherries from the corner store!
The day before, at work, I arrived to find my cubicle filled with mylar balloons and Happy Birthday banners. My friend D made quite a spectacle out of me that day. In addition to the balloons, she brought in a huge cake decorated like the American flag, and had everybody sign a card. I wondered why everyone kept saying �Happy 40th!� to me. I mean, how did everyone know how old I was? Then when I saw the card, I knew, because the card read (on the outside): �No one would have ever guessed you�re 40�� and on the inside it said, �So I told everyone!� D gave me a $50 gift certificate to my favorite salon/spa, and someone else gave me a basket of flowers. It was a very sweet thing for D to do, and though I don�t usually like being the center of attention like that, it was a fun day.
So then on Thursday night, I mentioned to P that the first thing I was going to do when I woke up on Friday was clean the kitchen floor, because it was awful, and I wanted to start the weekend with a clean floor. I never thought about it again until the next morning, when I woke up to find that sometime after midnight, P had scrubbed the floor clean. That was my first indication that the day was going to be okay after all.
Today B is going over to her sister�s house to spend the night, and P and I are going to wallow in our aloneness. We�ve planned an excursion to the mall, where I will attempt to spend my gift card at BB&B in record time, and he will out somewhere else, doing something else (some boy thing, I don�t know what). Then we will rendezvous at some yet to be determined restaurant for dinner.
The lesson here, I guess, is that if I want something, I have to ask for it. I can�t expect P to be able to read my mind, though you�d think after this long, he�d be a little more in tune. But at least he�s receptive to, and even grateful for, my involvement in planning my own birthday celebration. I had no reason to be upset at him for anything, and he had no reason to feel lame. It was a win-win situation.
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