When my mom died 7 years ago, I think I grew up. Before that, I was still "the child" who had no trouble running home whenever things turned sour in my life. After she died, the last thing I ever wanted to do was impose upon my dad and make things harder for him in any way. I felt a surge of independence, which sounds kind of strange, considering I was 31 years old and had been living on my own and raising my niece for years before that. But I had this safety net, and I never strayed too far away, in case I needed to jump into it.
About 2 months after she died, I borrowed my dad's Chevy Astro Van, loaded up a bunch of camping gear, coolers stocked with sodas and ice, and my 10 year old niece. And we headed out for a 10 day road trip. Just the two of us. Dad was nervous about us going, but supportive too. He gave me a couple of hundred bucks to pad my wallet. Oh, and he also gave me his debit card and password (just in case).
I don't know why I felt this need to just *go* somewhere, but I did. And I wanted T and I to do something adventurous together. So I mapped out our route, made all my reservations at campgrounds and motels in advance - and even paid them in advance. Always the planner.
We did a big loop. We started in Portland, Oregon, where we were living at the time. East to Boise, south to Salt Lake City where we stayed at an awesome campground adjacent to a big water park. We went south to Bryce Canyon. Spectacular! Onward south to the Grand Canyon, where a kind Japanese tourist took our picture together standing on the rim of the canyon. To this day, that is one of my all time favorite pictures.
Southeast and through Zion, we headed for Las Vegas. On the way there, T kept singing "Viva Las Vegas." We checked into Circus Circus. That was a fun night. That hotel has a lot for kids to do. At this point, we are about 6 days into our trip.
When we left Las Vegas, I didn't tell T where we were going. I only said it was a surprise. She was curious, but pretty tired at this point, so she didn't press me too much. As we approached the L.A. area, she started getting more curious.
Fumbling with my maps, trying to navigate the streets of Anaheim, I took a sharp turn and the cooler of melted ice in the back of the van turned over, soaking our sleeping bags and everything on the floor. That was a groaner, let me tell ya. Finally I found the street I was looking for, and as I steered onto it, T let out a squeal and started bouncing up and down in her seat. We're going to Disneyland! We're going to Disneyland! Wouldn't you know it, a big billboard advertisement had foiled my surprise. Big arrow ---> This Way To Disneyland, it said. Oh, well. Couldn't keep it a secret forever, I guess.
We found the humble motel where I had booked us a room, and checked in. We went swimming, ate a bite of dinner, and went to bed. But I don't think she slept. After all, she was going to Disneyland in the morning!
We had a great time there. Even though we could only go for one day, we made the most of it. I took four rolls of pictures. T with Mickey Mouse. T with Minnie Mouse. T with Goofy. T with Everybody! That was quite a good day.
Then we loaded up the van again and headed for Venice Beach, where a guy in shorts exposed himself to me, and I saw my first 70 year old man in a thong. Time to go.
Up the coastline. Destination: San Francisco. We made it there in the evening, and stayed with some friends that night. They took us on a whirlwind tour of the city the next morning, and by 3:00 pm, we were headed north again.
We got to Medford, Oregon sometime in the early evening and stopped for gas. This is where my advance reservations had ended. I hadn't planned anything for Medford, so I was either going to have to use my dad's debit card (as I had run out of money) or we were going to have to camp, which was fine with us -- we'd camped at least half the way so far. But wouldn't you know, it started raining. Pouring. Storming. I made the decision to press on.
North to Eugene, where I contemplated stopping. But it was only about 11:00 pm, so we kept going. We made it home to Portland at about 1:30 a.m. We crashed on our beds immediately, and woke up to a beautiful day.
Ten days. Lots of driving, lots of sight seeing. Lots of time together. I felt a connection being made with T during that trip that hasn't been repeated since. She's 17 now, and well, she's 17. I wonder if that trip made any kind of impression on her. If it meant as much to her as it did to me. I know I was changed afterward. I began to feel comfortable making grown up decisions. I made some pretty major decisions after that. And I haven't regretted a single one of them.
I think I grew up after my mom died. Or maybe I just learned to appreciate things more. I don't know. I do know I'm getting the itch for another road trip. B is a little too young just yet, but as soon as she's ready, I'm ready. And maybe we can talk T into coming with us. She's a good travel buddy.
0 Comment(s)
